You can’t buy pleasure

Pleasure is not a destination we magically arrive at when we buy our dream home, new gadget, or vacation.

Pleasure is a state of being to which we must bring constant awareness. And that is a life-long journey that never ends.

Like all journeys, we need a map, skills to navigate, and help from others who have traversed the terrain that far-too-often can be unforgiving.

This journey of pleasure can be deeply fulfilling if we feel resourced and equipped to navigate it. But without those things, it can lead to deep suffering.

That’s not easy. And what makes it even harder is that from the moment we are born, we are told, taught, and conditioned to believe what fulfillment, pleasure, and peace look like.

We are told that a certain type of marriage, money, and will bring us happiness. And anything that deviates from that will be bad.

We are told that we must have a certain type of body and have a very specific type of sex in order to be accepted and loved by others.

But it’s all a lie.

We get to do whatever we want to do.

Pleasure is not connected to jobs, money, vacations, or anything that we buy.

Pleasure is only connected to our bodies.

My teachers have taught me that to be in pleasure we must deepen our relationships with our bodies and our desires. We must learn to negotiate and come into agreements of consent with ourselves (both the physical and subtle body), with other humans, and with the land.

Only then can we find fulfillment, joy, and peace.